Found: 35: Silent & Painful.

Guys... Guys... Guys... GUYS. Chill lol. Don't worry, this is and always will be a Justin Bieber FanFiction okay?! Remember that! Lol and I'm just going by what the comments said when I asked for suggestions. So just calm and understand that everything's okay lovelies(: gosh, I love you guys so much haha. And and and and and Just to let y'all know, there is no other blog. Well there is, I just don't post on it because no one comments. So for those of you asking, there's your answer!

*cough* *cough* anyways, here's your next chapter!

This time, I'm gonna ask for 8 comments!(; can you do it?! Oh duh! Of course you can! But still. I'm done talking now haha sorry.

Chapter 35:

December 31st, 2012

11:00pm

 

We sat talking and talking and laughing and flirting. It was fun just to be with him, but it was different. Ugh, this is what I hated, I always compared Harry to Justin and I couldn’t help it. But as I was going to say, it wasn’t the same as it was with Justin. It was so much less affectionate. With Justin I was myself, with Harry I was… someone else.

“What’s that?” Harry asked as he pulled away from tickling my sides.

“What?” I asked.

“That ring. What’s that for?” he pointed to my hand.

I looked down and covered my hand with the other one. I never took off my ring that Justin gave me for Christmas or the necklace for my birthday… They were too special to me.

“It’s nothing, just some little gift.”

“From who?” he asked right away.

“Justin- listen it’s nothing.”

“You still love him don’t you?”

I closed my eyes and avoided the question. I didn’t want to tell him that I loved Justin, because I didn’t want to love Justin. Well I did, but I didn’t. I didn’t know, this was too complicated for me to handle. I nodded slightly and he breathed out.

“I knew it.” he whispered while rubbing his temples.

“I’m sorry.” My voice cracked.

“No, no, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done this with you. I knew it was bad, I shouldn't have taken you away from Justin...”

Harry seemed so apologetic but at the same time i could tell that he was somewhat pissed, unlike he was a week or so ago. Just as I went to hug him, a few seconds of silence came from the TV before music started playing. Justin’s music. We both looked at the TV before making eye contact once more.

“Thank you for doing this Harry. You helped me realize that I can’t move on this easily.”

“Well, I’m glad that your happy.” He said.

“Are you going to be okay?”

He looked at me and smiled, “Yeah, I’ll find someone, but for now, friends?”

I nodded and hugged him. Was it really that easy? Did we just become friends yet again? I felt bright inside, but I had a plan. I wasn’t going back to Justin. I had to discipline myself, and him most of all. I couldn’t just give in easily, if I’d ever give in again.

“So what are you gonna do about you and Justin?” Harry asked.

“Well, I mentally decided that I’m not going back to him. I’ll always love him, but right now I can’t be with him, and I might never be able to.”

He nodded and smiled. We continued to watch his performance and the rest of the show celebrating New Year’s with everyone else. When the countdown came, we did it together with our party hats on and our bottle of wine in hand. Just as the ball dropped, he popped the cork and we celebrated 2013. We laughed and took pictures and danced and just had fun. It was probably the best way to spend the New Year.

It got old after some time and Harry decided to head out. Justin still wasn’t home yet, but I figured he’d gone clubbing with his friends or something to pass the time and rid the pain. That sounded like him, definitely.

“I’ll talk to you soon right?” I asked.

“Hopefully, I have to travel a lot this month. We can talk on the phone?”

“Of course.”

I watched Harry put on his boots and his slim overcoat. I gave him a long hug before he walked towards the door. Just as he reached for the handle, the door swung open, causing him to stumble backwards.

“You bastard!” Justin yelled.

He lunged forward, hitting Harry and causing them to fall to the ground. Harry forced him off eventually and I pulled Justin away from the fight. I pushed him hard into the coat closet door and yelled right in his face.

“What the fuck are you thinking!?” I yelled.

He stared passed me at Harry angrily. I couldn’t smell beer or alcohol on his breath so he wasn’t drunk. I wondered what had gotten into him.

“Harry, I’m so sorry.” I said as I walked back towards him, helping him brush off his coat and pants.

“It’s fine love, I have to go but bye now.”

He shook his head before stepping out of the door and shutting it behind him. I turned back towards Justin and gave him an angry look. He took off his shoes and headed towards the kitchen without a word. I followed behind him, watching him grab a glass of water in the process.

“What has gotten into you Justin?” I asked as I stood in the doorway.

He looked at me with his pissy attitude still present, “What has gotten into you!? You’re already all over another guy and we broke up a week ago!”

“Justin, Harry and I aren’t dating. But seeing you’re interested, do you really wanna know what happened? He asked me why I still where these,” I held up the ring and the necklace, “And you know what I said? Because I still love you, and I always will. But that doesn’t change us, we still aren’t together and won’t ever be. I’m done with you Justin, especially after this. You pushed it too far.”

He paused for a minute, “But I didn’t know I-“

“But nothing Justin. Like I previously said, you ruined everything and I can’t go through that again.”

His pissed look turned to sadness as he finished his water. He brushed passed me out of the kitchen and upstairs. I could hear the frustration in his steps and voice through the walls. I felt bad, but it was really his fault and I couldn’t do anything about his actions.

 

The next morning, I got up early for another photo shoot. Today, I had to do one with a fellow man model. I wasn’t sure how this would be, but I was definitely excited. I brushed my teeth after my shower and did all of the essential things to get ready. I just through on some sweats and a tank to arrive in. When I was making myself toast, Justin came downstairs. I smiled at him and he ignored my attempt to be nice. I shrugged it off and continued making breakfast and the eating followed. Justin ate too and he watched every single one of my moves.

“Where are you headed to this early?” he asked as he sipped his coffee.

“Photo shoot. I think we’re doing a few shots with a male model if I’m not mistaken.”

“Male model?” Justin’s voice cracked.

“I know right?” I said lightheartedly as my face lit up, “This is going to be great.”

I could tell that I was making Justin jealous, which was exactly my plan. I put my plate and cup in the dishwasher before putting on some shoes by the door. Justin followed me everywhere which was kinda starting to get annoying. It was cute thought. Ugh, (YN) stop! You need to stop thinking about him like that. It’s over.

“Listen, (YN), can we talk before you leave? I just wanna work things out.” He begged.

“Work what out? Oh, look at the time, I’m almost late! See you later, okay?”
I ran hurriedly out of the door and into the car that I pulled out of the driveway. Justin watched me leave and I felt proud. I held in my feelings and acted happy in front of him. This was working out way better than I thought it would. I honestly had the hardest time saying that stuff to him but the only thing that mattered was that I did. Now, off to pretending to be happy.

I arrived at my photo shoot and got dressed and got my makeup done and was camera ready. I did a few shots by myself but when the model came in, I felt really uncomfortable. He put his arms around me and we had to laugh and be flirty. It was weird, let me be honest. On the first break, I tried my best to keep my distance from him.

I walked towards the table to great a snack and grabbed a donut seeing it was pretty early in the morning and I hadn’t eaten a huge breakfast. I glanced over and saw the male model, whose name I hadn’t yet known yet, grabbing a snack too.

“Hi, (YN), it’s nice to finally meet you.” He said.

I turned to him and smiled, wiping frosting from my face, “It’s nice to meet you too. And you are…?”

“James.”

James, I liked that name somewhat. I smiled and just as I began walking away, my eyes landed on Justin. I quickly moved back towards James and stood closer to him. He seemed really surprised that I was acting suddenly all flirty with him.

“Just go along with it.” I mumbled, “Oh James! You’re so funny!”

I fake laughed and he actually went along with it. I looked out of the corner of my eye to see Justin walking towards us. James looked really scared and he quickly disappeared as Justin walked up. Justin was intimidating to some, I guess. He looked really hot today too; his hair was a little messy and he had in his earrings with- okay I needed to stop seriously this time. I’m done with him. Jeez.

“What are you doing here?” I asked as I sipped my water and began walking away.

He followed right next to me, “I’m here to pick you up.”

“You’re like, a half an hour early.” I said matter-of-factly.

“I know, but I came to support you and watch. As a f-friend.”

I took a deep breath and smiled before I was ordered back on set. I took a few shots like usual and then we changed the setting and all of that jazz. And then when James came on, I was excited.

“James.” The photographer said.

James began walking towards me, but he stopped. I was confused as to why, but I looked back at the photographer.

“Wait, why don’t you let Justin take this now that he’s here.” She said.

“Am I still getting paid full?” James asked.

“Of course, now bye-bye.”

“James! Wait, what!?” I yelled.

I reached after him, but he was gone faster than ever. Justin stood, scratching the back of his head innocently. I had a feeling that he had something to do with this.

“Why do I have to take pictures with him? The tabloids would go crazy.” I asked as Justin made his way towards me.

“Honey, these don’t have to be sent in to the magazines. Or we can just crop him out, special effects.”

“But then why didn’t-“

“Ah, ah, ah. Now stand there and go like this together.”

She shot a pose and I looked towards Justin. He smiled and held out his hands. I rolled my eyes and let him take the lead and we posed for the pictures. I had to laugh and smile and sometimes act serious with him. It sucked because it wasn’t helping the fact that I was trying to be done with him!

“Can we be done?” I begged.

“All done! You may leave.”

I breathed out in relief and walked off set to grab my clothes that I wore there. Justin followed me like a lost puppy and I honestly wanted him to go away. He was annoying, not cute. Well he was cute, but still!

“Can we talk?” Justin said once again.

“About what?” I asked.

“Us. What’s going on?”

“Well let’s see. You cheated, you lied, and now you want me back. Listen, I’m not going to give in anymore. Even though you’re the most beautiful boy I’ve laid my eyes on, it won’t change a thing. We’re just friends living in the same house, okay?”

He looked down with his hands in his pockets and lead the way out silently. We walked out of the studio together and to the car. The car ride home was not only silent but painful.