Beneath Your Beautiful: 35: Canada Bound.

Can I just say... OMG. So far, there are 33 comments on the last chapter just about what I should do after this story and it's AMAZING that you guys are taking the time to do that(:

Obviously, if no one noticed, most people want a new story so I'm gonna give it to you(: it'll be up in late January, early February, more than likely! I just gotta work on it and start it for that matter...

I wasn't expecting so many different ideas from so many different people and OMG thank you! I just can't stop smiling! I've read everyone's comments and all of your ideas and I'll try to put everyone's ideas together in some sort of way and hopefully it'll turn into a good story!

I'm still accepting more ideas and if you have any please leave them below because I will read them(;

It'd be way cool if this chapter got 30+ comments too... But I'm not gonna ask for that! How about 9 comments for next chapter?

Chapter 35:

December 23rd, 2012

4:00pm

 

I stepped off of the airplane bundled up like an Eskimo. Jeez, Canada was colder than I remembered. I pulled my scarf tighter around my neck and hooked arms with Harry. Being on a commercial flight with one of the biggest stars in the biggest boy band in the world wasn’t that great…

The airport was already packed full of girls, screaming and cheering and just simply freaking out, if you could even call it simple. I was oblivious as to how they already knew that we were even coming, but I quickly realized why they were all here. And it wasn’t just for us.

“Justin! Justin over here! Can I an autograph? I love you Justin!”

I covered my face as we were escorted through the crowded airport. Harry kept his head down too, his arm around me and helping me through the people.

“IS THAT HARRY STYLES? IT’S (YN) (YLN) TOO! BROTHER AND SISTER, LOOK OVER HERE GUYS!”

I sighed and we kept making our way through. In the back of my mind, I wondered where Justin was. He had to be somewhere in the airport if the fans were all still here screaming his name. I closed my eyes briefly and it that short time I happened to run right into a hard body. Of course I was the one to fall back on my ass, but he didn’t budge.

“Oh shit,” he said as he turned around and bent down to help me up, “(YN)?”

I uncovered my face to see Kenny holding onto my arm. My face lit up immediately and I wrapped my arms around him as an instinct. It felt like forever since I’d actually seen him.

He pulled away and laughed, “There’s not much time to catch up, we should probably get out of here.”

“We?” I said, grabbing onto Harry once again.

“Well since you’re all going to the same place I figured we can ride toge- let’s just go.”

I followed close behind him with Harry’s arm hooked in mine. I didn’t exactly want to go with him, but I figured it’d be less of a hazard if we took two separate cars. Hell, I didn’t know that Justin was going to be here when we were otherwise I would have scheduled an earlier flight… anything to avoid him.

I still hadn’t talked to Justin since the day after he got wasted. I was sure that he was still doing it- drinking I mean. Of course he was, he chose that over me. It was hard to stop myself from calling him, especially after what happened at my dad’s house.

We got out of the airport and shuffled into the car. I sat down and watched as Harry took a spot next to me. Our bags were all piled in another car and when everything was finally settled, Justin appeared. The door opened yet again and as soon as he stepped in, I saw the emotion drain from his face. I mentioned that I hadn’t seen him since then either, right? Well I hadn’t.

He sat down across from me and I looked away awkwardly. I was praying that he didn’t say anything, but knowing Justin, I knew that he would anyways.

“It’s pretty cold out there.” He said as he rubbed his hands together.

Nobody said a word. I wasn’t sure if anyone was breathing either, it was that silent. I sighed and looked up at the ceiling for answers. I wanted this car ride to be over already and we had to drive 45 minutes.

“Yeah, pretty cold.” I said as I scooted closer to Harry.

 

We arrived at the Bieber Ranch and everyone, well just us three, stumbled out of the car and stretched as we grabbed our bags. I had too many bags and not enough arms so I decided to take more than one trip. I dragged my bag inside with Harry in front of me and Justin tagging along behind. God damn, this was awkward. And I hated to bring Harry into it but he insisted on coming.

“Pattie!” Harry and I said simultaneously as we gave hugs. Justin was the only one to yell mom, of course.

“Oh you guys came together,” Pattie noticed quickly, “I see we’re making progress.” She mumbled as she smiled to herself. We all knew what her plan was and I wasn’t exactly for it at the moment.

“Mom,” Justin mumbled himself, “not right now.”

I bowed my head and laughed. I found my way to our room with directions and Harry led the way. He’d been the most talkative this whole trip. We were so alike, but right now I was being oddly silent. We dropped our bags and Harry left to go meet the family while I stayed behind for a minute. Good thing Harry was outgoing and shit because otherwise he’d be around me constantly. I headed towards the door to go grab my last bag but the door swung open before I could get out.

“Oh, Justin.” I backed away as he set my bags down just inside the door.

“Hi, I uh, just came to bring you your last bag.” He said as he pointed to it.

“Thanks.” I quietly said as I dragged it to the bed.

I was expecting him to leave, well scratch that, no I wasn’t. I had a good feeling that he was going to stay and try to sweet talk me or some shit, I just repeated to myself: Don’t fall for it (YN), not this time.

“Hey, I wanted to tell you something.” Justin said before he turned to leave.

I looked up and stopped unpacking my stuff, “Yeah?”

“I’ve been sober since the 14th, for over a week.” When I didn’t reply, he kept on talking. “Yeah, I realized that alcohol was tearing my life apart so I had to stop. I don’t think I’ll completely quit, yeah I’ll have a few drinks every now and then but not all of the time. I won’t be getting-“

“Justin,” I interrupted him, “I get it. And I’m proud of you, keep it up.”

I gave him a sincere smile and he headed out. Of course, yet again, before he left completely, he spoke up again. “Dinner will be ready soon downstairs.”

I nodded and he finally left. I let out a breath that I’d been holding in for a while. He was so cute; I couldn’t believe he quit drinking. And it was all because of me, which was a good thing this once.

 

“Alright I think I’m going to go to bed.” I said as I stood up from the couch.

“This early?” everyone asked surprised.

We had just finished dinner and I wasn’t tired, but I just couldn’t handle this pain in my chest anymore. It was all too much, for me to be here, with Harry and all. I didn’t understand why this was all so hard on me when I was the one avoiding Justin. It didn’t make sense to me.

“Yeah, I blame jetlag.” I laughed. “But I’ll be up early tomorrow to help cook and everything so don’t worry.”

Everyone said goodnight, including Justin, and I left the room and headed to mine and Harry’s. Harry didn’t even follow me, he was flirting it up with one of Justin’s cousins. I couldn’t hold back my laugh at him; he was always flirting with one girl or another. I didn’t mind, if that’s what he wanted to do than hey, I gotta be there to support him.

I laid down in my bed and cuddled up into a little ball with my phone in my hands. After a while, I got bored on that and just laid with my eyes closed. I was having a hard time sleeping so I grabbed the one thing I knew would somewhat help: a t-shirt. Not just any, Justin’s. itsmelled just like him and when I missed him, I usually used it to calm myself. It oddly helped on a lot of different occasions.

I closed my eyes once again and drifted into a deep, calming sleep. So I thought.

I woke up and Harry was sound asleep in the bed right next to me. I rubbed my tired eyes and got out of bed. This had been bugging me all night and now I had to get it over with. I had to talk to Justin.

I searched around the house with only the light from my phone illuminating everything in sight. I finally found my way to Justin’s room and quietly opened the door. To my surprise, Justin was wide awake himself. He looked up from his notebook and stared at me with no expression. I moved towards him and held out my hand. As soon as I began talking, I was interrupted by a loud cry. My attention shot over to a small basinet rocking gently in the corner of the room. Charlotte. But how?

I ran towards the basinet but when I got there, there was nothing. It just rocked back and forth by itself. I turned around and Justin appeared just inches away from me now, standing. I breathed heavily and felt a tension as a tear fell from his eye.

“Where’s Charlie?” I spoke out in a saddened tone.

He stood there with tears rolling down his face, unable to move. I tried to get his attention and when I did he became angered and stepped closer to me. I was eventually stopped when my back hit the wall harshly. Justin pushed me up against the wall, breathing down on me.

“You killed her. Y-You killed our baby.” Justin whispered as more tears fell down onto my shirt.

“What?” I started tearing up.

“You did this!” Justin screamed at me. “You took her away from me! It’s all your fault!”

“But I didn’t-“

“Just shut-up! Stop talking!”

I shakily tried moving away from Justin but I was restricted between him and the wall. It’s your fault. It’s your fault. The words stuck in my head like glue. I fell to the ground and wrapped my arms around my knees. It was my fault. It was my entire fault. I covered my ears to block out the voices, telling me that I had killed my daughter. I rocked back and forth with tears streaming down my face and all I could do was scream.

My eyes shot open. My chest burned and my face was damp with tears. It was all a dream. It was all a dream. Justin was standing over me, violently shaking my shoulders. I could see his lips moving but I couldn’t hear anything for a few seconds. I breathed in sharply and my hearing came back.

“(YN)! Are you okay?” Justin held my shoulders as I sat up.

I looked into his tired eyes and all I saw was regret. I parted my lips to speak but nothing came of it. I felt warmness down my face once again and before I could even wipe away the tears I wrapped my arms around Justin’s neck and held him tightly to me. His reaction was late, but he soon put his arms around me and embraced me like he’d always done in the past.

I pulled away minutes later and he wiped my tears with his thumbs. My tears dried up and now my eyes were just puffy. Justin still sat on the bed beside me, staying silent.

“Were you having a nightmare?” Justin asked quietly. I nodded and he blinked a few times and rubbed his tired eyes. “I could tell. I came in here because I heard you talking and you were tossing and turning and then you started screaming- I was scared.”

I swallowed hard and looked down. I wanted badly to tell him all about my dream but I didn’t bother, it was no use anyways. I stayed silent while he gently rubbed my thigh, calming me down. After about 15-20 minutes, he stood up and headed towards the door. I begged with my eyes for him to come back, but there was no way when I could barely make out any words.

“Justin,” I stopped him. He turned around right away and waited for me to speak again. “Do you, do you think it’s my fault that C-Charlotte d-died.” My voice cracked.

Justin’s jaw tensed and he unclenched his fists. “Not at all, why would you think that?”

“I just- I thought-“ I couldn’t even come up with any words to explain it. It was hard enough talking about Charlotte, especially to Justin.

He came back to my bed and walked around, sitting down leaning against the headboard and turning his head towards me. I didn’t even move a bit when he leaned in and kissed my forehead, I just let him. “I would never, ever blame you for that.”